Friday, June 5, 2009

I Know I Just Did, But How Dare You...

My previous post got me thinking about how annoying I can be about things(it also got me thinking about "The Choice Is Yours" by The Black Sheep). For example, getting mad at a car for going too slow, then getting mad at a car for going fast when I know full well that I have driven down many a street going too slow, and many a street going too fast. Plus, I'm the person who would get in-the-car mad at anyone who honked at me for going too slow, or shook their fist at me for going too fast. I say "in-the-car mad" because I get totally furious inside my car, screaming and swearing up a storm, banging on the wheel, but I'm scared to take it out of the car with yelling or honking for fear of a road-raged individual punching or shooting me...it happens. And it did happen to The Joyous One and I once in Forest Park...only we didn't get punched or shot, just yelled at by a woman who called us dyke-ass mother effers and told us what we needed was a man...and you know, if we'd thought of that "man" thing in the first place, The Joyous One and I could have saved ourselves a lot of grief, and pain, and a lot of same-sexin, so really I should find that woman and thank her. Anysybil, reactions like that from people are what stop me from honking, yelling out windows, etc. But road rage and honking and dyke-a** mother effers is not what I meant to write about. What I meant to write about is...

Things that are okay if I do them, but not okay if you do them...

Don't we all have these things? You cannot deny that you have roamed aimlessly through the produce section, carelessly blocking access to the potatoes, even though a week before, you in-your-head swore at someone for doing the exact same thing with the apples. Don't pretend like you've never been walking through the concourse at Wrigley, and stopped to look for your friends behind you, even though last time you were at a game, you pushed past someone who was doing the exact same thing, saying "Excuse you!" as you went by. We ALL do things that really piss us off when other people do them and we all know that we do. Perhaps if we just get some of these things out in the open, we can all stop doing them(listen, I know this is impossible, I just want to get them out in the open as my way of venting). Here are some of my favorite things that I do, that really piss me off when other people do them...


Take right turns slowly

Swear in public

Call the waiter or waitress by name(not sure why this pisses me off when other people do it, it just does...shut up)

Bang into people w/o saying "excuse me" when in a large crowd

Sit like a dude at concerts and sporting events(legs splayed as wide open as possible. I think men sit this way so they don't sit on their junk. I sit this way because I like having space)

Interrupt

Cough or sniffle when a cold is present

Chew and crack gum

Clap in the movie theater

Dance to "Single Ladies"

This list could go on and on and on and on, so I think I should just cut if off now, before I realize how hypocritical and annoying I am. I'd love to hear what some of you all do that really cheeses you off when other people do the same...you know you've got some good ones! Oh, and not commenting on other people's blogs? Another thing that I do, yet it pisses me off when other people do it...don't piss me off!

2 comments:

  1. When I am a pedestrian I always have the right of way, other pedestrians should not act like this when I am driving or they will get run over.

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  2. Snazzy green layout, Changeroo! I like it! It's very refreshing!

    ReplyDelete